I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize