i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
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my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
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I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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