I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Randomize