He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize