Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
im six kinds of drunk right now
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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