we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
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