apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
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