I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
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