Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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