the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
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I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
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so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
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