It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
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It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
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i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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