1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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