we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
You are the jesus of drinking
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize