your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im holly from the hills drunk
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize