i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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