This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Randomize