No stitches, just platelets and will power
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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