I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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