So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
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