she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
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