While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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