This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
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