That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize