Is it normal to miss your booty call?
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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