Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize