she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
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Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
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