I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
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I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
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He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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