Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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