I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
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Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
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WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
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