The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize