you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
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