Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
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