Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize