omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
In America we eat man semen.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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