a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Fuck appropriateness.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
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I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
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I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
My ass is underappreciated
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
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