quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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