She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
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