I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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