We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
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