Where did you get a picture of my penis
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Randomize