great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
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when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
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When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
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