party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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