Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
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