Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize