There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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