I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Operation Purity has been aborted
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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