So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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