All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When did we convert life to cartoon?
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize