Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tied me up with her honor cords...
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize