hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
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